backwards

Ng Reya’s birthday party was something else for me. It didnt only reunite me with my close friends but also led me to learn a new practical concept in dealing with daily situations. I wouldnt elaborate on that though.

Sis was there… as well as Monde. They are just a few people whom Ive met online but became one of my good friends in the real world. Sis was always there for us, girls (me, Ng Reya, Jen, and Rosary, for that he has earned the Sis endearment from me and Kas (cuz as in cousin) from Ng Reya, et al). I am sure Ng Reya was deeply touched with Monde bothering to bring her a birthday cake. What more, Ng Reya invited her nephew and niece. We enjoyed the two kids’ company. Josh and Joan (i hope i did get the spelling of her name correctly, ng reya) are entirely opposite, while the girl loves to swim, Josh wouldn’t even stay by the pool’s stairs. Too bad though, Isha did not come… and we tried calling and texting Roselyn but she was out of reach. Roselyn, if you are reading this… please email me or text me… Mas better email, oks?!

There was a small feast courtesy of Rosary’s aunt that Ng Reya declared herself as an adopted niece. Hehe… Ng Reya, it just goes to show that you are well-loved. 

The swimming ended at 9pm but the drinking session continued at the house, lasting until 12mn after Sis and Monde went home. But me and Rosary stayed up until almost 4am because we were discussing a lot of things with Ng Reya’s friend, Benedict. We jumped from the differences of men and women to reincarnation… soulmates, karma, hanggang umabot sa UFO at ang theory na nasulat sa Da Vinci Code ni Dan Brown. Some stuffs and theories are pretty far-off and doubtful pero it was a nice conversation.

Ang favorite "pulutan" sa inuman - ang debate tungkol sa mga babae at lalaki. Sis kept on saying that it was women’s fault that they sin. Sis, peace tayo… pero I dont entirely agree with your conclusion. Sabi ko di ba, men always  have a choice… Men can always choose to ignore the temptations… But that’s not the case, most of the time, since we use the reasoning - ako na nga nilalapitan, bat ko naman iignore. Wala naman akong feelings, wala namang mawawala sa akin. True din ang point ni Sis na kung minsan ang mga babae kasi nagpoprovoke sa kanila na gumawa ng masama even if they dont mean too… Pero ang point is pwede mo pa ding iwasan. Sabi ko nga, you can always refuse. Ay naku, mahirap kasi maging tao at lalo na magpakatao.

To Ng Reya, Happy Birthday! I wish you all the best… Halong permi, okay?

My LSS - Far away by NIckelback

This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there’s just one left
‘Cause you know,
you know, you know

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you’ll be with me
and you’ll never go
Stop breathing if
I don’t see you anymore

On my knees, I’ll ask
Last chance for one last dance
‘Cause with you, I’d withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I’d give it all
I’d give for us
Give anything but I won’t give up
‘Cause you know,
you know, you know

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you’ll be with me
and you’ll never go
Stop breathing if
I don’t see you anymore

So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
‘Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
‘Cause I’m not leaving
Hold on to me and
never let me go

Haha… ang horoscope ko (oo naniniwala ako sa horoscope, its serves as a warning lang naman) mukhang tugma na naman.. … Pati ung kanta ng Mojofly na Tumatakbo tugma din sa current status ko. Eto ang kanta ko sa ngaun…

Tumatakbo ang oras
Na iiwan na ako
Ng panahon
Di na nagbago
Bawat araw pare-pareho
Parang kahapon
Tumatakbo ang oras

May birthday cake ka nga
Ngunit wala namang kandila
May christmas tree ngang malupet
Wala namang dekorasyong masasabit

To Jen… hehehe, kahit iniiwan mo na ako… Pano na ung planong foundation natin para sa mga old maid? (ang ibig sabihin ba nito Rosary tau na lang ang magtatayo? hehehe Joke.) Basta Jen, I am really happy for you… Sobrang happy sa lahat ng dumating sa buhay mo ngaun. basta… basta… kita na lng tau sa sabado…

Bukas birthday ni ate Reya and sabi sa Sabado daw ang celeb sa bahay nina Rosary and Jen… Madami akong dapat gawin pero I wont miss the birthday celeb… Di ko na rin kasi nakikita sina Jen for over a month na. The last time was when we celebrated Rosary’s birthday last month.

Teka kinakausap ko ba sarili ko? Kasi parang ganun ung tono ng entry na ‘to… hehe

Darn, sana sweldo na!

I have a lot to write and stories to tell but I am just being choosy what to post in here.

I have good news and bad news… and more dilemmas to write about.

I dont know if I should be thankful for what I am facing right now… whether this is an indication that finally I am getting somewhere… and growing up. I hate being a grown-up… but I have no choice but to accept this. Di ba there’s no other way but to go up… and going down is not option.

Wow, ang galing talaga ng crush ko… He  successfully defended his ATP Masters Montecarlo title. Galing…  Anyway, kahit late ako ng four minutes, medyo swerte pa rin ako… Maraming nagkukunwaring gentleman sa bus na sinakyan ko… O sige na nga di sila nagkukunwari… Salamat na din at least I dont need to stand from Cavite until Baclaran and Baclaran to Ayala.

I found a possible lunch refuge near the office… Velasquez Park in Salcedo Village. It’s just a block away from my work… nearer that the park I frequented when we were still in Legazpi Village. However, Velasquez has fewer trees compared to Legazpi… Oh well… it’s still a park.

Yesterday, aside from sleeping for almost 15 hours, I played with Joaquin Gabriel. Hehe… my pamangkin is becoming a nocturnal creature like me and my brothers. He sleeps late too… He also loves to travel, naku tuwang-tuwa un if we take him out kahit sa labas lng ng bahay… or magroroad trip, he loves being on the move kasi. Kahapon we watched TV together, chat online together (he keeps on playing with my hair), ako ung nagpapaligo sa kanya and nagpapabihis sa kanya, basta i so love my nephew. I am so happy spending more time with him. Ang cute-cute kasi, my sister Geselle is lucky to have a son like Joaqui. She should know… He’s so energetic, bubbly, and smart. My parents adore him so much… my brothers love to play with him. Our youngest calls him Baby Bunso. Hehe…

I am still in this "lull" state… no actually in a state where I feel like talking but too tired to do so. Ng Rhea’s already in manila… But she will be working in Subic by next week and I am too tired to travel to Quezon City, so I wont be seeing her before she leaves for Subic.

Hay i dont know wat to write… I guess I am too drained. Yeah, I am too drained. Imagine, I slept for over 12 hours. Today I slept from 230am to 4pm, straight… walang gising2. Stressed nga sobra kaya nagawa kong matulog ng ganyan.

I hope soon I wont find myself saying the same things. I am too tired hearing myself saying the same things. Hindi na healthy… Hay….

i just hate the elevator at our new office.

On Monday, I was rushing back to the office when the elevator almost sandwiched me… no it already did sandwich me… I am sure I told the guy already inside the lift to hold the door but i guess he didnt hear me or pushed the close button… kaya ako naipit sa door buti na lng di masyado… although nagbang ang head ko sa door nang malakas na lumingon lahat ng tao na nasa lobby. Inis na inis ako sa nangyari tapos ngayon takot na ako pagsasakay ng elevator… Binibilisan ko na pagpasok sa loob ng lift, ayokong maipit ulit.

Anyway di doon nagtatapos ang bad experience ko with the elevator… kasi kanina pinagmumukha akong tanga ng lift. Pabalik na ako sa ofc from ministop nang 2 beses ako nilampasan ng elevator… promise pinindot ko ng maraming beses ung up button pero nilampasan pa rin ako.
Nilapitan na ako ng sikyu at nagtataka sya na ilang minuto na ako nakatayo sa harap ng elevator… Naiinis talaga ako sa elevator namin sa office bldg… mukhang ayaw sa akin.

This is my current fave… It has a snappy, jazzy feel that I love to listen to it over and over again - Up Dharma Down’s “Oo.” Besides its addicting beat, it has a nice lyrics… Okay, just because I can relate… Haha, i consider it nice. Bleeh!!! Pero seriously, it’s a nice listen.

These are my favorite lines from ‘Oo’ (because I find it funny):

Kung alam ko lang ako’y masasaktan ng ganito
Sana’y nakinig na lang ako sa nanay ko

The other song I love listening to over and over again is The Killers’ “Smile Like You Mean It.” And these are my favorite lines from that song:

Save some face
You know you only got one
Change your ways

And Nouvelle Vague’s version of “I Melt With You.” Very nice…

Some spur of the moment thing whenever I feel sleepy… (weird I write when I am sleepy)

Only a few people understand my traveling vice. Even at home, I think they don’t really like the idea that I spend a lot on traveling.

Still, I am contemplating going somewhere again. I still dont know where… Definitely somewhere south… I am even considering visiting Iloilo, hoping that the familiarity and homeliness would make me whole again.

I am in a sluggish mood right now. I was just reminded of these three words - learn, relearn, and unlearn. Perhaps, I should make it a habit assessing my life by what I have learned, relearned, and unlearned… or by what I want to learn, relearn, and unlearn.

For now, what I want to:

LEARN - to "fly free"

RELEARN - skills I have had when I was in college

UNLEARN - procrastination.

What I have:

LEARNED - that people perceive me as a serious person and unapproachable.

RELEARNED - interacting with new people (because at some point, i rather stop being close with anyone as they come and go)

UNLEARNED - looking for allies and consoler (may word ba na consoler, masearch nga) if I feel down.