backwards

I know I will miss my students no matter how noisy and restless some of them may be… even if many of them make me want to walk out of the door every weekdays… no matter how they make my heart break and head ache. And I somehow feel sad that I didnt really say goodbye because I hate announcing my reasons for leaving. That I didn’t really tell them some things that I wish to say. I am telling myself that I should not be emotional about it because students easily forget (except if you really made a mark in their lives and I am not sure if I did… hehe). But then even if the truth is they would forget who I was… and that I had been a part of their lives, I would not forget those over 200 students I have handled and faced for nine months. Funny but it seems it is them who made a mark in my life. I have a learned a lot because of them. There are many personalities whom I would surely remember.

I would like to think this is just fatigue and the fact that I will undergo another transition. Do I feel sad? In a way, because I have backed down for reasons that I feel unhappy. I know I talk in riddles again. Even now, I feel unhappy… What does that make me? Oh well, i’ll figure it out soon.

I am thinking I could have done more pero di na ako happy. I feel theres this one big hole in front of me and if I won’t do anything
i’ll be sucked into that void and I’ll entirely lose ME.

another batch of movies that I recommend:

Hotel Rwanda and Million Dollar Baby… both are 2004 Oscar awards nominees. The latter had helped Hillary Swank bag another Oscars, if I am not mistaken.

i wish i will have more time to work on my blog…

Watched two magic-related movies over the weekend (har, this blog is turning into update on my weekend movie marathon) - The Illusionist and The Prestige. Both movies have their own merits… The Illusionist’s appeal is its love-story-driven plot while The Prestige is obsession-driven. But the latter will let you think more than the former. The Prestige, however, reminded me of the plot of Charles Dickens’ "Tale of Two Cities."

I also watched The Departed days ago… and The Last King of Scotland. Martin Scorcese’s The Departed is a great watch and Leonardo DiCaprio showed his acting prowess here. The latter is just okay… I didnt really like it.

I also caught Pan’s Labyrinth, the Oscar winning Spanish film. It deserves the Oscars… well-crafted film and the idea of intertwining the fantasy world of Ofelia with the reality is good.

Yey, tomorrow’s a holiday around here.

I should try to relax… even if days are flying fast. I guess I am just stressing out over a lot of things, including submission of documents needed at the end of the school year. I know I am pressuring myself too much for trying to cover everything all at the same time… I always tend to overwhelm myself with tons of work that is unproductive and quite unhealthy. So I am trying to put myself in a relaxed mode. And quite surprising that the Internet seemed to have in a way calmed me down (considering that I try to avoid the Net before as I was having an overdose). Oh well, nothing like blogging away while listening to Launchcast. I have to admit that I kind of miss that lifestyle, especially the music part. One of the joys of online radio is you get to listen to a wide range of music… where can you listen to Acoustic Alchemy, NIN, some 80s hits, etc? Only online…

Later, I plan on setting aside reading the essays and doing the grades and just soak up the TV rays. I just hope this would indeed relax me.

And… Rosary’s birthday is coming up. Etchos’ day has always been something of a get-together. Well, I am really looking forward for a dose of good conversations, company, and food.

And I have just learned blog-city will no longer offer free accounts… and I have Dec. 30 2007 to transfer my entries from 2004. That’s a lot. Wah!

As usual, my weekends are spent in front of the TV set, watching DVDs. The latest and my recommended movies I have watched recently are:
1) Stick It - love the story, love the soundtrack
2) Step Up - a friend told me about this movie and he was right… it was a good one. I enjoyed watching the dancing part… the story may be quite similar to Save The Last Dance… but it’s less emotional than it.
3) Pursuit of Happyness - it’s almost like Forrest Gump but who couldn’t relate with someone who has been through a lot and ended victorious.
4) Blood Diamond - has social relevance… and Djimon, a best supporting actor nominee in the recently concluded Oscars, did a great job here.